Every once and awhile I like to pause and show you the “real” around here. Sometimes I show you in pictures, but today I also want to tell you how very much I don’t have it all together. :)

I’ve mentioned a few times that our house rarely looks perfect. OK, let’s make that never. Well, OK, maybe about five minutes before a party, but that’s it. So that would amount to about 15 minutes a year.

Fifteen minutes a year, it looks pretty darn fantastic. ;)

But the other 525,585 thousand minutes it’s just…normal. I’ve shown you our normal:

Uhhh…you don’t have a toilet seat sitting in your bedroom?

I was sitting in the office working on bills today, and this was my view:

Not awful, cause there’s a cute Bub smiling at me. ;) Just normal. This is actually pretty clean, really. The floor is cleared enough for us to walk through the family room.

What you can’t really see are the cluttered countertops, the island covered in shopping bags I haven’t emptied, two in-between projects on the windowsill (where else would I keep them?), the coffee table covered with toys and a pizza box. You can’t see the damaged spot on the floor, the messed up drywall on the ceiling from a leak in an upstairs bathroom.

I wanted to write this today because I neverevereverNEVER want anyone who visits this blog to leave feeling inadequate – that breaks my heart. But I certainly understand it -- even I read blogs and feel that green monster raising it’s ugly head. I wonder if the house is always that clean, the toys are always put away. How she does it all, with more kids, a bigger house, a full time job. And I’m lucky to keep one room completely clean for a day.

I’m here to inspire. I want to show you how you can transform your home and make it your haven. But I want to be real about it at the same time. Of course, I chuck the stuff out of pictures – and that’s just because I figure most of the time, you want to see pretty, not cluttery.

But beyond the not-always-perfect-house, I wanted to let you all know that there are so, so, SO many days where I feel like I am barely keeping my head above water – trying to do it all. Keeping the house picked up, let alone clean. Dealing with five animals – a fish, three cats and a puppy. Being a good Mom, an attentive wife, a supportive friend. And trying to post as much as possible here on my beloved blog, which has become my business. (Best. job. ever.)

At least once a week, I feel like an bad friend because I haven’t returned an email or a text or a phone call fast enough. There are days I walk into our house and just feel completely overwhelmed with all that needs to be done. Some days I wonder how it’s possible, as a stay-at-home Mom, I can’t keep our home and lives perfectly perfect all the time.

And then I’ll realize, yet again…dear LORD, it’s normal. As much as I want to do more projects and post more than I do, I choose not to. I don’t do it all – I don’t want to do it all. I crave a better balance in my life, but I’m guessing, hoping, praying this is normal? All mom’s feel that way at times, right?

But when I say I wouldn’t have it any other way, I truly mean it. Our sometimes messy home means I have a sweet four-year-old running around. It means I take time away from cleaning to work on a DIY project – my passion. It means I get to blog and share and write and (hopefully) inspire…as I am doing right now, with my feet propped up next to the pizza box on the coffee table. ;)

So I guess I just wanted to take a minute to say, I don’t do it all,  and sometimes I feel like I really stink at what I do do. :) But I love my life, all of it’s imperfections and messes. I’m just so completely happy to be doing what I’m doing. With the people I’m doing it with – including you all.

I wanted to let you know that. I never want you to think I’m capable of doing any more than you can do. I just show you the pretty more often than not, because for the most part, I like to see pretty on blogs and magazines and TV. I’ve got enough of the real at home. ;)

But I will keep showing you the messes here and there, cause it’s the truth. We’ve got the pretty and not-so-pretty around here, just like every home. :)

And I luuuurve it!!

Didn’t know we were thinking about it? We were.

But…we’re not.

It started last year while we were attacking our debt snowball. We looked into refinancing our current mortgage into a 15-year. To do so, we had a realtor come out to the house to give us an idea of the value.

The news was not good.

When I say not good, I mean…not. good. We were expecting it to be bad, but not that bad. And the longer I let it set in, the more it got to me.

You know our house is my hobby. It’s also now a big (HUGE. MASSIVE.) part of my business. So to learn that what we’ve done to the house didn’t really mean much, well -- it was hard for me to take.

I’ve poured my blood, sweat and tears into this house because I love it, I enjoy it and it’s my passion. But I was hoping my improvements would help the bottom line a little bit too. At least right now, they don’t.

There’s a number of reasons why – first of all, if you haven’t noticed…uhhh…the market pretty much sucks right now. Royally. We live in one of the best areas in the country (based on schools, incomes, jobs, yadda yadda), in a fantastic location, in a great neighborhood.

But the neighborhood is part of the problem. No one ever moves. Seriously. Our realtor had, like, five houses to compare us against in the past two years. That’s a good thing, in that it’s a great place to live. A bad thing because there’s so few comparables.

Another issue was that we built this house –- picked all the fixtures, upgrades, elevation, all those fun goodies. But those goodies are so inflated when installing them through a builder and rolling them into your mortgage, compared to buying them outright. A $100 light fixture is going to cost you a lot more than that, for the convenience of having it done for you.

And there’s that whole mental thing -- “What’s another $120 on a 30-year mortgage? Let’s do it!!”

(We didn’t do a lot of that, but all the little things certainly added up.)

So off the bat, I’m quite sure we paid more than we should have for our house. We were also in the first, say 25 percent, of homes to be built in our neighborhood. So there were plenty more built later that were a LOT bigger for less money.

So our square footage compared to the others in the neighborhood really dinged us. We’re tiny compared to most of them, but we paid more for our house.

DANGah Gina!

So when we got the news about the value of our house, I wallowed for a couple of days. Boo hoo’d a bit. Got really mad. Then decided we just needed to move. Pronto.

Like, rightthisverysecond.

But there was an itty bitty issue. We had no money.

We were still in major debt back then. We didn’t have a down payment. And we weren’t moving with tons of debt and no down payment.

I looked at houses online for about one day. I was freaking out people. I felt like we had to cut our losses and get out of dodge. Please remember, we had just gotten this bad news, I was emotional, and was not thinking clearly. At all.

So anyway, looking at houses didn’t help things one bit. Or maybe it did.

I didn’t find one house we would want to live in. Not one.

Cause, oh yeah…WE LOVE OUR HOUSE.

We built it, remember? We picked out every little thing. I took a second job for a bigger down payment, we saved like fools, I drove by the lot every. single. day. to check the progress. I had our superintendent on speed dial and he was my BFF for five months. We watched it go up bit by bit, falling in love a little more every day.

One day, I visited after they had finished spraying the walls with our Beechwood Grey color. I stood in the middle of the house, taking it all in and SQUEALED very loudly. Then added a fist pump and screamed “YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!”

And my BFF superintendent walked out of one of the rooms just a few feet from where I was standing. :)

We love our house.

One day after we got the bad news about the value, I had a long, emotional conversation with my Dad, and to say he put me in check is an understatement. And after that hour on the phone, it’s like the clouds had parted and it had all clicked in my head.

We are so, so, so insanely fortunate to have this HOME. A house we love, that’s the right size (probably a bit too big, really), in a beautiful neighborhood.

We aren’t upside down on our house. We can afford the payments (our mortgage is well within our means). And if we’re intense with it, we think we can pay off our house in five years or so.

How many people do I hear call into the Dave Ramsey show every day who can’t pay for their home anymore? They are quite literally walking away from it. It breaks my heart for them. Kills me.

So basically, I told myself to BUCK UP BUTTERCUP. You know…to shut my (own) trap.

We’re not moving.

But here’s the thing – we’re still going to spend money on our home. We’re not going to live in it and not live in it. We’re going to finish the basement (which will help the value), we’re going to install new faucets, plant more trees, make it what we want it.

Is that the best idea? I don’t know. But it’s what we’re going to do.

Who knows what the economy will bring? I know for certain the value will go up again. I have no doubt in my mind. What I don’t know is if it’s ever going to be where we want it to be.

But right now, I don’t care. We don’t know if it’s our forever home, but it’s our forever home for right now.

Just without the pumpkins and corn stalks. (I just love that picture.)  :)

Of course, please know…if you’re thinking about moving, you just moved, your getting ready to move – I am NOT talking to you. I’m just sharing what we’ve experienced with our specific situation and how we got to our decision. (I’ve heard Dave Ramsey tell plenty of people to sell and take a bit of a hit on their house, just because they can make it up so easily on a new purchase right now. It is definitely a great time to buy.)

And if you are moving I’m so freakin’ excited for you and I want you to blog about it so I can see pictures of your new house. Seriously. Moving to a new home is daunting and overwhelming, but it’s also pretty darn exciting. :)

So, I know I’m not the only one who’s gotten bad news about their biggest life investment – their house. Anyone else been through it lately? What did you decide? Stay or go? Are you happy about it? Sad? Frustrated? Excited? Do tell.

Hello all! Hope you had a fantastic weekend!

It’s been a great one around here for more reasons than one. :)

I finally, FINALLY got the decrapification of the basement done. I mean, almost every single bit of it. There’s just a few minor things I want to go through, but the big stuff is DONE!

I even finished up going through the guest room closet, which has been on my list for about a year now.

The house feels like it may just float away it’s so light. :)

I was going to show you some of that massive accomplishment tonight, but then something came up.

This little guy:

We found him this weekend, and before we saw him, adding a dog to our family was the last thing on our minds. I mean, for a while I’ve been telling hubby I’d really like to get a dog for the Bub. But we’ve just been talking about it, here and there.

But lately, when I see a dog, something new has been pulling at my heart strings. It’s kinda been weirding me out -- I mean, we’re cat people. Always have been. We’ve both owned dogs in our life, but it’s been a long time for both of us.

But today, I picked up that shaking little guy and he cuddled his wet nose into the crook of my neck, and something in me just absolutely melted.

He cuddled into me, as if to say, please don’t let me go.

It was the same thing this one did the day I found him:

And it was hard for me to shake that feeling. I put him down. Walked away, went back, picked him up. He hung onto me again. Put him down again…walked away. And went back again. This time, I had tears in my eyes.

It was so incredibly hard to walk away from this pup. That last time I put him back down, trying so hard not to cry.

And after that, all I could think about was him. I couldn’t figure out what in the HECK was wrong with me. I had absolutely fallen deeply in love with that face. Hubby thought I was losing it. I thought I was losing it.

After making MANY phone calls to friends with dogs, doing a ton of research online and much discussion with the hubby…we brought him home:

Look at that SQUISHY face.

I can’t believe we own a DOG.  :)

The cat’s are adjusting amazingly well. He’s nuts about them. (For real!) So funny.

Peanut has made himself right at home:

He ADORES my hubby. We adore him.

Now excuse me, as I head to bed extra early tonight. It could be a long one. Wish this new Momma a restful night. ;)

But seriously…isn’t he the sweetest thing you’ve EVER seen??

But there was beauty, everywhere you looked:

The Opryland Hotel is seriously one of the most magnificent places I have ever stayed. Absolutely gorgeous. And just like last year, I didn’t have nearly enough time to look around!

I only got night shots, and they’re still amazing:

There was plenty of goofing off:

I’m trying to bring Traci to the dark side…that would be giving up the sweet nectar that is soda. It’s not happening. But that’s why I love her! :)

We even fit in some thrifting:

Kate and Chris’s faces are the BEST. (We weren’t too sure about those chairs.) And no, that is not a beer in my hand, it’s a root beer. ;)

I got to meet the man who inspired us to change our lives, and our family tree:

Thanks SO MUCH to Jen for having me along!! (More on that soon!)

But more than anything, there was a lot of smiling:

(Chris and me)

TONS of hugging:

(Marian and me)

Bonding:

(Lorie and me)

A LOT of laughter:

(Myra, Chris, Richella, me, Traci and Rhoda)

Making new friends:

(Shauna and Ashley, new friends; me and Layla, an “old” friend)

And generally having an absolutely fantastic time!!:

I reconnected with the friends I’ve already met over the past year, and I finally got to meet so many bloggers I knew were friends but I had never met in real life. It never ceases to amaze me how I can meet someone for the first time, yet it’s as if I’ve known them for years and YEARS.

It’s instant friendship and love and understanding, and I am so fortunate to call all of these women friends and coworkers. It overwhelms me. What a blessing blogging is.

To say we had a blast would be an understatement. :)

Cheers to all of you – bloggers who were friends before we knew we were. :)

(If we met and I didn’t mention you, I mean YOU too!!)

A special shout out to my roomies – Chris, Rhoda and Beth:

I already miss our late night talks!! :) You are a few of the loveliest, funniest, best women I know.

I got home from Nashville just in time for the storm of the century (echo, echo, echo)…ice, snow and wind for the next couple of days. This was our bedroom window one hour into it tonight:

That would be a sheet of ice. Thankyouverymuch.

We are warming up, hunkering down and planning on staying in for the next 24 hours, at least. I hope to get some projects started and a few finished since we’ll be stuck inside. Stay safe if you are facing the same!!

**Some photos borrowed from Beth and Kate! :)

Well hello! I’m loving all of the suggestions (and empathizers) to the paper dilemma! (Dun dun duuunnnn.)

Number 9,324 I love blogging – you peeps get me. :)

Reason 9,325 that I love blogging – because when something’s on my mind, I tend to yuck it up on my virtual notepad…this blog. And you guys put up with it. :) I’ve had a bit of an epiphany lately and I was inspired to write about it tonight.

It’s a big one…and it’s about time. It only took 35 years for it to happen.

I’ve decided to GROW UP.

Not too much, mind you. Cause grown ups don’t say “Squeezaaays” and “cauuute.” I’m guessing they don’t anyway. (I have it on good authority they do say “lurve” though.)

I guess it started when we started to get serious about paying off our mountain of debt. The more we’ve paid off, the closer we’ve gotten to becoming debt free – the more mature we’ve become. That whole “only spend what you have” thing kind of forces that.

It’s made me (us) be more accountable, spend wiser, delay gratification – all that annoying grown up crap. :)

A few weeks ago I realized I needed to do that in another area in my life as well. You see, I felt like I was growing – not up, but OUT. (No, I’m not pregnant.) ;)

It wasn’t so much the holiday weight that we all feel – I’ve just been putting on weight for months now.

Make that years.

No one I know sees it like I do, of course. But you know how that goes -- we’re our own worst critics. And I just felt like a SLUG. You know what I mean? Like a puffy slug. Not pretty. Or fun.

But it wasn’t until I was visiting our family doc a few weeks ago (for my second case of strep throat in six weeks) that it hit me…I have to start taking better care of myself.

I mentioned to the doctor that I felt like I was gaining weight like crazy, and we had an interesting talk about it. I told him I wasn’t doing anything different, but felt like I was gaining by the month.

And he said something that caused one of those “LIGHT.BULB.” (name that movie!) moments. His response?

“Well, that’s the point – you’re not doing anything different.”

I’m getting older and I can’t keep doing what I’ve always done. (I know 35 is still young, believe me. But 35 is not 25. And it’s certainly not 17. Dang it!)

I tell you what – I walked out of that appointment a different person. It finally hit me – I HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF.

I’m pretty much addicted to soda:

(Oh sweet, sweet nectar.)

And I walked out of that doc’s office and gave up soda. I’ve tried it before and couldn’t do it for long. This time, it was cake. Almost twenty-something years of (at least) two sodas a day, and I just stopped.

I thought it would be hard, but something in me clicked this time. Every once and a while I’ll crave a soda and get one, but most of the time it doesn’t even taste good. The odd times it does, I just drink a tiny bit and that’s all I need.

More than three weeks in and I get the craving for it less and less.

I want to grow up and take care of my body. I take care of everyone else – our child, my husband (as much as he’ll let me!) and our HOUSE. But I don’t take time to take care of me.

I don’t know what’s hit me, but I’m tired of it.

So for the last three weeks, I’ve reintroduced myself to this one and her DVDs:

I’m not liking her very much right now…but I might in a couple months. If I can walk then.

I’ve been doing this again:

Aww, look how cute I look! 

I kid! That’s not me. Yet. (Someday I’ll look that happy on the treadmill.)

And today, I did something I have dreaded for years. YEARS.

I got a mammogram.

Yes, I’m only 35 and I got my first mammogram. It’s not as unusual as you might think. I had a bump years ago that turned out to just a fluid-filled cyst (determined through an ultrasound). But because of that, the docs wanted me to get a baseline mammogram at 35 instead of 40.

I got the notice months ago, and kind of ignored it. I didn’t make it a priority. I didn’t think it applied to me. I thought, I am only 35.

And then a month ago I got news that a dear family member (who is just a few years older than me) found out she has breast cancer. She has a child younger than mine. She has to undergo chemo. She started shopping for wigs.

It’s rocked me to my core.

She is my new hero, by the way. Her most amazing attitude inspires me to be a better person – I hope to be like her when I (finish) growing up.

Because of her, I finally scheduled that mammogram.

Was it uncomfortable? Yep. Was it painful? Yep. But the uncomfortable and the painful lasted for mere seconds.

Was it worth it? YES.

It was time for me to act like the wife, mother, daughter, sister and friend that I am. I needed to grow up and started taking steps take care of ME.

This isn’t a new year’s resolution. It’s who I’ve decided to be from now on. It took me a LONG time to realize I need to put myself FIRST sometimes. I need to eat more responsibly, get more exercise and grow the heck up. :)

I don’t know the results of my mammogram yet, but we’re obviously praying for a standard letter in the mail next week, and not a call from the doc in a few days. :)

I’m not writing this to preach to any of you. I’m not trying to get anyone to exercise more or at all. I AM asking you to give yourself a few more minutes a day. I do want you to ask your doctor when you should get your first mammogram. If you’re over 40, I want you to schedule your mammogram.

Yes, I’m bossing you around. Yes, I want you to put yourself first, for 20 minutes a day. Or the hour out of your week it will take to get a mammogram.

I’m still a newbie at this, so I’m certainly no expert. But I know something for sure – I’m not going back. I don’t know what’s gotten into me, but I like it, and I plan to keep it up. :)

 

**I waffled back and forth about getting this personal on here. I mean, I never even mention the words “b.r.a.” or “u.n.d.e.r.w.e.a.r.” on this blog, just because of the wackos out there. IfyouknowwhatI’msayin. ;)

But I decided to put on my big girl u.n.d.i.e.s and just do it – write it and hit publish. I don’t hesitate to hit publish much, but this one has my finger hovering. :)

If it gets just one of you to make more time to take care of YOU for just a few minutes a day, it’ll be worth it.

And now…I am hitting…publish.

I didn’t take my comfy pants off for days till last night. (Not the same pair all that time, mind you. Eww.)

I didn’t put bows on the presents. Wrapped and done.

I didn’t even use many tags. (Just coded them by wrapping.)

We didn’t have a beautiful family picture for our Christmas cards – I ended up making a collage so all four of us would be represented.

I didn’t get out of bed before 9 a.m., ever (even on Christmas morning – our children ROCK.)

I didn’t make “real” cookies with cut outs or beautiful icing (and Santa still liked them just fine…he told me so.)

The Bub didn’t change out of his Christmas jammies for more than 24 hours, and that was just to change into new ones.

I didn’t cook anything on Christmas eve. (Pizza. Thank you.)

I didn’t take enough pictures – I was too busy being in the moment. (But I’ll probably regret it.)

I didn’t pick up the millions of itty bitty legos that have been underfoot for days. (Still haven’t. I kind of surrender.)

I didn’t make the bed once, even with tons of family here.

I didn’t take one piece of Christmas decor down. (But I’m feeling the itch.)

I didn’t mind one single bit when the whole family sat down and watched Despicable Me during Christmas dinner. I loved it – it was easy and fun and relaxed and US. (We love that movie!)

I didn’t break out into hives when the house was trashed for 36 hours straight.

And then I still didn’t clean it after 36 hours – I just left and went shopping. :)

My husband and I didn’t exchange gifts – because being debt free is going to be our gift to each other and our family. (SOON.)

 

Every year, I have all of these visions of what our holidays will be in my head -- usually there’s a soft glow around everyone, birds are singing (somewhere) and I look 15 pounds thinner…it’s a great vision. In my head. :)

And those visions pretty much never happen. It’s never perfect. I never accomplish all that want to. Every year I say, I’ll make a list of those things I want to get done and make sure to do them. And every year life gets in the way.

A whole lot of “didn’t” happens.

And every year I realize how very OK with that I am. Our holidays don’t end up our like my visions -- they always turn out so much better. So sweet. So close. So much family. So much big, fat, LOVE.

I hope your holiday was all you (didn’t) envision and so, so, so much more. :)

 

I’ll be back tomorrow with an update on my office redo!

Hello there! Hope your Halloween weekend is going beautifully!

A couple of weeks ago, my Sis and I took a day off from the decluttering around here to take in some of the fall beauty around us. It was her last day before heading to her new job and my last day having her around all day. :( Sniff.

I do love being with her – I don’t just use her for manual labor. ;)

I’m so proud to be a born and raised Hoosier, and this time of year I am madly in love with Indiana. It’s quite beautiful. Most think we’re just flat fields – and we do have our fair share. But there’s more than corn in Indiana -- some really gorgeous parts too. :)

My Sis, the Bub and I started our day out by driving through one of our very favorite “drive by” spots – the Meridian Kessler area of Indy. We ooohed and ahhhed over the fantastic houses, and took some hi-I’m-not-crazy-just-obsessed-with-your-house pictures along the way:

We had to be fast and stealth-like so the owners wouldn’t call the cops on the crazy women taking photos. :)

Some were decked out for Halloween, and the Bub would alert us by screaming “STOP!! HALLOWEEN STUFF!!” at the top of his lungs and freak us out every. single. time.:

Some were just plain gorgeous with some simple mums:

 

Some didn’t need much of anything – they were gorgeous all on their own:

     The addresses have been blocked to protect those who live in the gorgeous houses :)…

    

Oh my. Grey siding, white trim, red door? LURVE.

Because it was such an amazing day, we decided to head over to what has quickly become one of my favorite spots in Indianapolis – Holliday Park:

It’s a fantastic park – complete with a nature center, beautiful architecture and gardens, tons of (HUGE) playgrounds and trails that take you through some gorgeous sights, down to the White River:

You can’t help but completely breathe it in. It reminds me of the camping trips we took almost every single weekend throughout the summer and fall growing up. The smell of wet leaves is seriously intoxicating.

No cell phones. No emails. Someday I’m going to take a fold up chair, hike down to the river to sit and just get lost in nothing.

What a great reminder to just STOP MOVING. Look around. Be quiet.

It was a perfect day, spent with two of my very favorite people.

It gets me so bad when I think about how much his Aunt loves him:

It makes my heart melt that our son is so loved by so many other people other than us. He is surrounded. :)

I had some fun with Picnik with this one:

That’s a framer for sure. :)

Hope you have a HAPPY and SAFE Halloween!!

The Before and After Party will go up Monday night!